LaVar Arrington Sighting

Written By Chris C-Ford ---- Friday, October 19, 2007

Last night I decided I would go out on the town. I grabbed $40 out of the ATM and was ready to party. I hit up the hippest bar in Fairfax, VA called Buffalo Wing University, where the average GPA is DD.

The bar was pretty crowded like usual, after all it was dollar beer night. I went to the counter and decided I would order a frosty beverage. The first thing I noticed was that a female bartender was wearing a fishnet shirt. The second thing I noticed was LaVar Arrington was pouring me a drink.

LaVar was pouring and taking shots as a group of losers...real big losers...started singing Hail To The Redskins. "Didn't he play for the Giants last year" someone commented. Guys were scrambling for anything they could find for LaVar to sign. One guy seriously said "you think he will sign my face". "Man LaVar is getting wasted!!!" someone else screamed. "Maybe that's why he crashed his motorcycle" another person shouted.

I quickly told my friend to take some pictures. All he had was a stupid cell phone camera. Having a photo on your cell is like looking at thumbnail pictures of porn. Just not worth it. Anyways, he needed to use the bathroom so he went to the Safeway next door. He picked me up some kind of strange thing that looked like a digital camera, but it apparently had something called "film" inside.

I snatched the camera from him when he returned but I screwed up and the camera hit the floor, taking a picture as it fell to the ground. I picked it up and looked around, but LaVar was gone. I frantically asked bystanders about the whereabouts of LaVar. I heard several things including "He's been outside in his Maserati with some white chick for like 20 minutes and his foot keeps stepping on and off the brake"

So I ran outside, camera in hand, and searched for whatever a Maserati was. I assumed it was nicer than the 94' Honda Accords and pickup trucks that lined the parking lot and nothing out there looked remotely nice. He was gone...and I had only taken one photo, and that was of the ground.


Chimpanzee Rage said...

That sucks...but wait, where's the picture of the ground???

Chris Ford said...

Its crazy. This camera thing makes me take all 24 pictures before I can even see the results. Then, I have to take it to some place for them to "develop" it. I wish I brought my real camera. As for that picture of the floor, you can expect it in 4 years when i find 23 other things to photograph.

Dtodd said...

From seeing them on the big screen at Wizards games, LaVar's wife is hot. Too bad you didn't see her.

I barely know her said...

I was there, and made the following comments:
-"Uh oh! Troy Aikman is also here. Watch out Troy!"
-"Man this line to get beer is crowded. Lavar probably has no problem getting one, like that time he jumped over the line at Penn State"