Getting Wizasted

The Final Wizards Game Of The Season Drinking Game, is going to be fun tonight. How do you play this game? Simple. If you can drink a 6 pack before the confetti comes streaming down from the rafters in Cleveland, you lose. So how do you win? You don't. Washington never wins, so you never win.

Just when I figured being 26 and living in the parents basement couldn't get any worse. I have to watch this damn game. Tonights 6pm start and impending doom have forced me to stop at the local supermarket for a Philadelphia 7-6 pack of brews. Arenas is out for the "year". Who cares. Its still 15 minutes to tip and I'm on brew #2.

Instead of going down full of hope and with heart, I plan to also "shut it down" for the season and finish the year in a depressing drunken stupor that may end with me sobbing as I fall asleep. At this point, I feel like the $16 I save if the Wizards don't win is worth more to me than the chance to watch the Wizards get eliminated at home where I have to commute to the game. Gas prices are too high.

I should have sold my collection of Arenas jerseys months ago. Now, when he is on a new team next year (injured) these jerseys will be worthless. They will have to go in the box in the basement with my Alonzo Mourning Dream Team II jersey, my Grant Hill jersey, and my Jamal Magloire Hornets jersey.

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