Who Steals A POS Car...Seriously

My 1992 Buick Lesabre BEFORE the entire roof, trunk, & hood lost 80% of the paint and started to rust. Also not pictured is the left side of the car, which had about 7 budweiser & beer stickers all over the gas tank and nearby area.

The blue book value of the car was $0. This is based half on all the rust and half on the fact that its just old.

So last night while I was staying in on a Friday night playing GameCube, somebody decided to steal my car right from outside my house (that had 4 other cars parked out front)

I know it was stolen and not towed because the thief threw all of my cards out the window including both my credit cards and my drivers license, while driving down the street, all found while following the literal "paper trail" of receipts and cards that littered my street. What kind of thief gets rid of that stuff? My metro card still had $3 on it! The thief however decided to keep my wallet, which literally was falling apart.

What the inside of my car typically looks like

So what was the main item that the thief got? Maybe about $4 worth of pennies, my Nike Shark cleats with broken laces from when I made the game saving missed tackle back in the year 2000, a $10 portable CD player that skips with my "techno mix" cd, a crap load of trash, and my resume. Hopefully the thief calls me back, not with my car, but with a job offer.

The "thief" stole the WORST car in the neighborhood by far. Untouched were Celecas, SUVs, and more.

Back in 2006, someone stole Dan Steinberg's car, which was later found destroyed. His 1996 Caravan was stolen outside the front of his house, much like my much older must worse 1992 Buick.

So be on the lookout for my car! It is very very very noticeable. You can't miss the beer stickers on the back drivers side!