Wizards Fan Fest 2011: I'm Why Baby Mamas Leave

On Saturday night the Wizards hosted a fan fest at Verizon Center that was free and open to the public.  This is the schedule of events that took place:

The event started off with the Verizon Center staff passing out some Wizards lanyards with a schedule attached to the bottom:

Of course I went straight to the concession stand to pick up my free popcorn and soda.  A good thing to fill the stomach before the night ahead of me.

The event started with Big Tigger coming out and saying Yezzir like 30.  That was followed up by the new darker blue G-Man.  A strangly lowly enthused G-Man was joined by the "secret service dunkers" who were in street clothes.  Some of those guys are better dunkers than G-Man.

After G-Man & crew missed several dunks, the Wizards girls took to the stage.  Despite "Ugly Cheerleaders" being the #1 Google search that brings people to this web site, this new iteration is much better than the girls from years past.  They danced for like a minute, and then ran off the court to change clothes.

Yeah we have such a great cameraman...Next up was Wale who came out on court with his #2 Wizards jersey that said Wale on the back instead of Wall.  He sang the song "BAIT" which was basically blasted on the loud speakers and he sang along with it.  Nobody could hear a word he said the whole time.  At one point during the performance Wale came into the crowd which was neat.

Next up was the player introductions where John Wall & Andray Blatche did terrible dances and Flip Saunders came out wearing the worst vest in vest history.  During the pre-scrimmage shootaround, Wale came on court and fired up and air ball.  He took about 8 more threes/long twos, all misses, before he gave up and went back to his seat.

The scrimmage was awful.  After all it was the Wizards playing against the Wizards.  John Wall had a bunch of open dunks, blowing by defenders like they were Washington Wizards.  The play was lackluster and not fun to watch.  I couldn't take any more half-ass basketball.  I got up and left...

Wale came out and performed another unrecognizable song and players signed autographs.  Autographs suck.  Especially Wizards autographs.  How is my Antawn Jamison autographed bball doing?  Its in the trash at the dump.  My autographed Gilbert stuff.  Trash.