The Wizard Girls

The Washington Wizards Dance Team has been renamed the Wizard Girls. I guess they are trying to establish a "brand" like the Laker Girls. Step 1: Copy the name of the successful group. Check.

They developed a logo, sold a Hooters style calendar, and recently came out with their own web site.

Check out the classy site here!

Whatever you do, don't skip the intro! Some strip club style dance music will get you bumping up and down in the office as you are introduced to the sexy posing Wizard Girls. Sucking in their stomachs and airbrushed, the girls are lookin good.

Then some great web site programming zooms in on each of the girls. Like zooms in really far. Like far enough to where if someone looks at your screen they will call you a pervert. For 5 seconds, my computer features the skirt and legs of a Wizard Girl, before it pans up to the jug region.

(Note: If you hit refresh, you will get a different girl)

Next you get to click on each of the Girls names, to see some great info like how long they have been dancing, nickname, and occupation. And holy crap there is more. Scroll down for a full bio. Seems like we've retooled with a bunch of rookies.

I could write about 300 posts about this but I don't have time to read all this.

• Most of their best accomplishments in life are being a cheerleader
• Many of them have been dancing "since they could walk"
• Most of their occupations are students
• Most of their ideal days include going to the beach
• Many of their favorite book is Harry Potter
• I saw "the notebook" mentioned a lot as well

Nick Young Blog?

I was checking out the Wizards web page (dancer page) and came across this blog from a new dancer named Melissa. It sounded very Wizard like, so after a few madlibs word changes (4 to be exact) we have a new Nick Young blog entry. (clearly fake)

We have been practicing for a few weeks now and have already learned a lot of plays we will be performing during the season. With the season right around the corner, it’s important for us to keep up with our workouts and practice hard. I really enjoy being at practice because the plays we learn are a lot of fun to perform, but most importantly I get to play with my teammates who are truly a talented group of men. The veterans have also been really helpful and have done a great job of welcoming the rookies on the team. Our practices are very productive, but we always find time to joke around and have fun too! I can’t wait to kick the season off and perform for the fans, and I know that my rookie season will be full of great memories.

Nick Y.

My feelings on the dance team

Wizards Dance Team

You've seen them walking around the loop at the Verizon Center. Sketchy guys following them, approaching them, getting photographs & (haha) autographs. You kinda look at some of the girls and say "her?"

I don't really get the dance team. It seems like they do the same thing every game. They take a song, chop & destroy it, speed it up, and then spin & fall & dance. They never even do the classic "line up and kick their legs at the same time move" that you always see. (man I hate that move. Everyone always cheers. I don't get it). And from the upper deck, all you see is tiny fly size women, meaning it could be an Entourage (mayor guy) situation for all I know.

I'm assuming the idea is to "pump up the crowd" meaning "getting the mostly male crowd excited". Woo Hoo. I'm pumped. Sure they do charity work and good things, but that is irrelevant at this time.

Please keep in mind my opinions would be completely different if I was in the lower lever. Then, I would be in love...

All that aside, I couldn't help but click on the Wizards Dance Team link this week at the Wizards homepage. (I'm only male human) They promised videos & pictures, a key ingredient to most sites I visit. I was surprised to see that Gilbert Arenas & Blah Blah Pecherov were in many of them. (Its like that crucial second where they zoom in on the guys face or...nevermind) This caused me to do something that I don't normally do, but say I do, and that is read the article.

Apparently, Gil & Pech (& Mike Hall) were judges at the dancer tryout. They came in to help pick between 3 finalists. Now this seems very unfair to me. You work your whole life at dancing. You practice dribbling with both hands, run wind sprints, & shoot 1,000 jumpers a day (or whatever the dancer equivalent is) and your fate is decided by 3 guys who don't know anything about dancing (or at least I hope not).

What if Michael Jordan was cut from the Bulls by Paula Abdul or Kwame Brown (neither one knows anything about basketball). The fact that they had players help decide completely ruins any credibility the dancers had in the first place. But that won't stop me from clicking back on that link several times.

I really enjoy parenthesises today...( ( ( ( ) ( ) ) ) (